(i wish i were smaller under your hands).

// insomiadiary

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Posted by Leanna - Monday, November 28, 2016 - 11:11pm


2016//11//27, 1:22 p.m.

VIII

Thankful to be alive today.  Remembering how far I've come along.  Regardless of everything that I may struggle with, the daily battles with myself, the truth that where I am and where I eventually would like to be have a definite vast volume of space and time between them-- I am ever so lucky to have been given a second chance at life, and love, and everything else in between...  Everyday, but especially so today, on a very special anniversary.  Thank you to those of you who support my journey-- I couldn't have done it without you.  You know who you are.  

*

Posted by Leanna - Sunday, November 27, 2016 - 2:28pm


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Everything happens for a reason.

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Posted by Leanna - Thursday, November 17, 2016 - 3:09am


Intuits about plants suggest areas of progressive change in ones life, emerging personal qualities; any hidden growth that is manifesting beyond what we are able to perceive.  Many people go through the different stages of plant life in their dreams, some experience the whole cycle of the plant’s life; some find they grew to a certain place and stopped.

A plant cutting that you are going to plant may link with good and growing parts of yourself that you are looking for a life situation to ‘plant’ or experience them in.  It may thus depict a search for a caring and ‘fertile’ relationship.

Plant substance is very important in human life.  In medicine it is of utmost importance.  In a real sense, human life processes transforms plant substance into self awareness, and all the expressions of consciousness shine out.  In some dreams this transformation of earthy non-living substance into living sentience is shown by plants in our dreams. 

 

"Dreaming of plants can show the deeply unconscious physiological process, such as cell generation and digestion.  Problems which cannot move more fully into consciousness and so are held at this level and so become psychosomatic pains or illness. This becomes clearer if we consider human life in relationship with other life forms.  A plant for instance might have some sort of bacterial illness, but would not be able to bring that to awareness.  In a sense many things which occur to us, although they are very real and definite, never become a part of our conscious life, but always remain in the ‘plant’ level.  If they are to move from ‘deeply unconscious physiological process’ to becoming known consciously, there are stages such events go through – for example exploring the dream.

Like a plant which takes the varied minerals surrounding it, and through its living process transforms them into its own integrated being.  The plant does not become the mineral.  Neither is it shaped by the forms of what it takes up.  It is influenced, it is colored, but its process transforms.  The healthy human being can do likewise.  A major part of unconscious mental process is to do with taking experience and integrating it into a meaningful whole.  If we could trace how the development of such mental activity arose, we might find that it is a reappearance at another level of the process of digestion and absorption.  But events need to be experienced to become integrated.  We are an enormously sensitive and responsive living process.  Our whole being can respond to what we experience or learn– words too have tremendous power within us.  Often, however, we have unconsciously deadened our emotions and sensitivities, and we do not therefore properly ‘take in’ what we have experienced.  The cosmic figure of ancient China’s Pan Ku-shown covered in leaves to indicate, ‘That Cosmic Man (or First Man) simply existed, like a plant, grown in nature."

 

(additional reading)

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Posted by Leanna - Tuesday, November 15, 2016 - 8:03am


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It’s about work–the constant trying. You work and you love and try and maybe happiness finds you. You don’t aim for it. It finds you on the right street at the right time. You work and you study and you try and maybe it’s good or great-- sometimes bad. It’s rare to be great, but it can find you if you work. Life is work.
--Katherine Hepburn

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Posted by Leanna - Tuesday, November 8, 2016 - 3:51pm


the heaviest white fog i have ever seen blankets the town where i sleep  (the kind of veil where you cannot see your hand held in front of you.  the kind of veil where everything you see looks like something else).

x
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Posted by Leanna - Monday, November 7, 2016 - 3:15am


(7)

Dreams of seven relate to the cyclic expressions of time and cosmos.  An outer expression of an inner spiritual principle.  The influence upon the physical, of the invisible rhythms within man, the cosmic keyboard of harmonic vibrations and energies.  Seven is the number of initiation.  

. . . 

Imprints of beggary link with feelings or traits of shame or inadequacy.  Feeling low or lack of self-worth.  In a few cases, a wise man lies underneath the exterior, who may be able to discern the secrets of life and destiny.  Meeting the loss of all material support and social standing... and the wisdom and strength gained as a result.

. . .

see also  

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Posted by Leanna - Friday, November 4, 2016 - 7:33am


did you know there's a butterfly

f
o
l
l
o
w
i
n
g
 
you

?

Posted by Leanna - Thursday, November 3, 2016 - 3:16pm


I haven't had the guts to write as of late.  I'm afraid it's because of what I'll discover swimming beneath the depths of me.  I think stress is causing me to be a different person.  I'm losing things, small things, large things... forgetting what I'm doing and where I'm going and how the stars sing at night.  I haven't been up during those hours.  Sleeping too much, sleeping too little.  I don't remember where home is...  what it's supposed to look like or feel like.  All I can remember is the ocean in reverse.

))

Posted by Leanna - Thursday, November 3, 2016 - 9:23am


"

dreamers

they never learn, they never learn

beyond the point of no return, of no return

 

and it's too late

the damage is done, the damage is done

 

this goes beyond me, beyond you

the white room by window

where the sun goes through

 

we are just happy to serve, just happy to serve

you

"

capture via e.e.

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Posted by Leanna - Wednesday, November 2, 2016 - 11:23pm